5/14/2012

The Avengers: Of Bad Movies Past

I was hoping to see The Avengers (アベンジャーズ) this past weekend. It turns out the international release dates are a bit staggered. I figured it was no big deal; The movie would be here in a week or so... wrong.
The Japanese release date isn't until after I come back to The States, August 17th. That's more than four months! To make it even worse, Cambodia (the second to last release date) would would even get The Avengers three months before I would. CAMBODIA!
Needless to say, I've resorted to ulterior sources, but all of this got me thinking. I really all the preceding Avengers movies, but what superhero sequels/tie-ins do I wish I didn't get to see? The ones I still wish Loki could just take from my memory.

Spider-Man 3 (and may god save the reboot)

After adoring the first two in the series (and even the musical), I not only lined up to see Emo Spider-Man mope around for over two hours, opening night, but I worked at Circuit City. Once it hit Blu-ray, it played on repeat for months. I only hope the coming reboot can somehow heal the scars.

Superman III and Superman IV

Between Richard Pryor and Nuclear Man, they should have just stopped at II. After that, the series fell off its high horse.

X-Men: The Last Stand  and X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Have you noticed the trend yet? Two great flicks and then the third is just dismal. I wont't even want to get into Origins: Wolverine, but after they released this, my hopes were anything but high. One question though, what on Earth happened to Nightcrawler?

Catwoman and Elektra

Batman & Robin is to Catwoman as Daredevil is to Elektra. All four were disappointing to say the least, but these two lead, female anti-heroes outdid their male predecessors... in absolute atrociousness on screen.

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance

Wait... they actually made a sequel? The first one was worse than The Punisher. If at first you don't succeed flop, try and try again.

Are there any other horrendous sequels you want mentioned? Are you fearful The Dark Knight Rises might go the way of Spider-Man? Leave me comment below and let me know! Also, if you're looking to get out a bit, checkout my KICKSTARTER Project, The Hitchhiker's Guide to: Earth.

Source: IMDb


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2 comments:

  1. I stand at the front of a rehab group. The group leader asks me why I'm here today. The fear of god is in me, but I begin to speak. "I have a confession to make." Everyone eyes me intently. "I like Spider-Man 3." Everyone gets so mad they proceed to stone me to death.

    Did I think Spider-Man 3 was the weakest of the Sam Raimi trilogy? Yes. Did I think the first two films were on a different level of quality from it? Not really. Is it one of the worst Marvel comic movies? Absolutely NO!!!

    If you have seen both Daredevil and Spider-Man 3, and honest to god think Daredevil is better, then you are either incredibly biased or mentally retarded. I'm sorry, I know film ratings are mostly subjective, but at some point unbiased film critiques have to take over. Being 'not as good' as the first two Spider-Man movies is nowhere near the same as 'the worst Marvel movie ever'.

    P.S.: no offense, but your criticisms lead me to believe you're in the "Please read my site and like me because I'm hip and cool!" crowd. If you'd said the portrayal of Venom was awful you'd have a valid criticism, but claiming it is '2 hours of emo Peter' is just stupid, since he literally spends less than 15 minutes with the symbiote on.

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  2. Thank you for your opinion.
    I completely agree with you, actually. I would watch 'Spider-Man 3' ten times over before I would sit through 'Daredevil' or 'The Hulk' (2003) again.
    In light of 'The Avengers' though, I was listing the worst sequels or tie-ins. Juxtaposition to the other two Spider-Man movies, the third was a major disappointment for me.

    PS Response: Again, I agree with you. Venom is the shit (in the comics and TV series), but the movie simply fell short. Peter may have spent only 15 minutes with the symbiote on but much of the film's mood/tone echoed that of an emo highschooler (in it's pacing and redundancy). The short bits in which he has straightened hair and skintight jeans are just an embodiment of a greater issue with the entire movie, in my view at least.

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